September 2018 Resolutions



I feel like I haven’t properly welcomed enough months this year. I like to attach significance to dates and times. I guess life has been too fast-paced for me to properly feel its passage. I was born in March, so I love March. I love to welcome it and enjoy it.
I feel like right now, I have the time and energy to actively feel the start of September, and set up some resolutions. I’ve been reading material online, and watching TED talks that have inspired me to lay out resolutions daily. Obviously I haven’t been doing it, but like most people, the start of a new month is a just cause to start afresh again.
Without further ado, here are my September resolutions:

September 2018 Resolutions

1.       Write more
I’d been on a roll for a few weeks. I’d been writing a lot and feeling good about myself. Somehow for the last 3 days, I don’t feel that way anymore. I think it’s because I wasn’t resonating with what I was writing. However, I have chosen another subject and I hope I can write joyfully again. Also, I’d like to write a fiction book. I’ve been inspired by someone and I think I can write one too. I’ll go online for advice on how to outline a fiction book because the last time I wrote a book, I didn’t take into consideration any of the fine aspects of fiction writing.

2.       Read more
Who am I if I don’t have ‘read more’ on my resolutions?! Haha, wouldn’t be me. I LOVE reading, in case you didn’t know. As I grow older and my goals become more focused, I find myself reading more and more non-fiction. I’ve mentioned before how I love reading personal growth and development. I also LOVE, LOVE reading YA Fantasy. I’ve barely finished 4 Fantasy books in the past few months, and I think the universe is telling me something. Anywho, I’ll be reading more.

3.       Self love
In my last post, I mentioned I was going on a self love journey. I suppose it’s coming along nicely. I’ve been watching all these TED talks that resonate with me. I just might reach that insane level of self esteem that some people have. I find that taking care of myself and being mindful of what I put into my body is helping me realize a bunch of things. It’s actually helping me love myself more. I also need to start saying positive things to myself and stuff like that. My poor self image is pretty mind boggling. I have a lot great qualities and skills. I’m a pretty cool person. It’s insane. I’ll get up to that level of self esteem, though.

4.       Stop being such a people pleaser/ butt licker/ doormat
I don’t understand how I came to be as such. I find myself bending over backwards for complete strangers. I’m not even talking in the oh, she’s nice kind of way. I probably come off as creepy. I smile at everyone and say hi. But sis, who’s saying hi to ME? Anyway, this isn’t about that. It’s about being a fool (and a tool). Let me elaborate. In my Statistics class, I was sweltering from the heat and suffocating to boot. I turned on the AC, right? But the girl next to me wraps her scarf around her. I’m completely fine, just dandy really, with the temperature and the significant improvement in circulation. So, what do I do? I ask the girl if she’s feeling cold. She says no, I’m always cold. I ignore her repeated re-assurances and turn off the AC and open the windows. Who’s suffering now? That’s right. Me. I’m not even joking—this comes completely naturally to me. It’s some reflex level stuff. I’m a natural doormat. This is after days of recognizing and being mindful of the same fact. I don’t want to be like this anymore. I refuse to mistreat MYSELF and not take care of MY BODY. How is this normal? I’m not having it anymore.

5.       Be more confident
I have a lot to say about this step. First of all, I find myself trying to fit in too much. I try to imagine myself as not too different from everyone else. In case I hadn’t mentioned it, I’m a foreigner in my country. I act like I belong here. I’m not even trying to be mushy or whatever. I always felt like everyone else to be honest, because, let’s face it—I grew up here. I identify as a local. But the thing is, people don’t treat me like one. I find myself trying to tone down on the way I speak, or try to relate to things with everyone else but no one else is having it.

I only figured this out recently—I’m a foreigner. Even if I don’t want to believe it, I didn’t have the same experiences growing up as a local. I’m looked at different. I’m even treated different. (Hello, unfair taxi prices.) So yeah, I find myself trying to seem less cool than I actually am. Stuff like that. But you know what? I am different. There’s no need to change who I am for people that won’t appreciate me anyway. So, I’ll use those words that no one understands. I’ll be hyperbolic. You don’t get me? Fine. I’m not sacrificing my identity for strangers.

Also, I’m going to start wearing the clothes I want to wear. Sure, I’m not usually comfortable doing that but I’m not going to be a slave to my irrational thoughts. My severely misplaced low self worth. My appalling lack of self love. WHY SHOULD I CARE WHAT STRANGERS THINK ANYWAY?? I’m my own person, navigating through my own life. Why should I let transient people dictate how I dress?

6.       My story gets to have the voice I give it
I’m writing out my own story with my own choices, decisions and actions. I don’t want to view my life in other people’s eyes, or their perspectives. Yes, I feature in other’s stories, but how does that have more weight than my own story? I get to have the command of how I narrate my story. To be honest, I find myself going out of my way to have a mark on other people’s lives. I do the dumbest things, just so I can be THAT character for someone else. So they can say: hey, so yeah this girl did this for/to me. I’ve been noticing the problem with this thinking lately, even though I’ve known I was doing it for a long time. I don’t want to be someone that does things just so people can have a certain character in their lives. Actually, I find it sickening now. I feel like I’m getting to the root of it. I’d like to blame Young Adult Contemporary Fiction but I know it’s something deeper. I do things for people just so they can reciprocate but they don’t. I stopped this foolishness by the way. I’m a far better person for it.

7.       Break way from culture
I’m not willing to butter up my culture’s ego anymore. I come from a shockingly sexist, patriarchal and backward society. And the worst part? I enable it. I continue to be the meek girl who listens to male figures and their absolute bullshit. Their power plays and condescending tones and behaviors. I clam up instead of stating my opinions, my answers to things that involve MY LIFE. MY FUTURE. How dumb can that be? I don’t subscribe to the gutter that is my culture. It’s insanely backward and tragically sexist. I refuse to shut up anymore. I refuse to do things that are against MY code of conduct. I have not come the conclusion that my culture is stupid by chance, it is insanely abnormal. I refuse to shut up form today. I am a strong, independent, opinionated, educated modern woman. My culture has gone unchecked for far too long. It belongs in the past. In the old days of ignorance and stupidity. This is the new era. It’s a new age. Old people with their backward mentalities hold no power over me. I’m a free soul; a free spirit. I refuse to be treated like cow dung by senile old men.

In conclusion
Well, wow. This turned into a rant/vent session. It’s alright, it’s good—great, actually. I find myself realizing more and more how abnormal some of my behaviors are. I’m working towards being a better version of myself. These September resolutions are a great way to keep track of what I want for myself—to be highly aware of my being. To be aware that I am in control of my destiny and nothing and no one can stop me from achieving what I want to.

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