Hey, you.

Me.

They don’t know you like I do. I care about you more than anyone else in the entire world. I know all about you, more than anyone else in the whole wide world. I’m gonna be with you forever. I’ll never leave you. Ever. I love you, and want the best for you.

What they think is wrong. They don’t know ANYTHING about you. Whatever they say, is not true. I know you, and what I think is all that matters. NEVER think twice about what they say about you. They don’t even know HALF of what you’ve been through, what you’ve fought, what you’ve achieved.

How happy you’ve been. How much you’ve wanted to live. How much you’ve wanted to hoard memories. How much you’ve wanted to go for a calm drive in the quietest neighborhood. How much you’ve wanted to watch the stars forever.

All the clothes and shoes you’ve wanted. How you wanted to go for a professional manicure for the first time. How you just wanted to lie on the grass forever. How you just wanted to watch the sunset. How you just want to feel the wind on your skin.

How you love the sound of speeding cars. All the nights you cried yourself to sleep. And the one time you tried so hard not to cry and ended up dripping pure whole tears from your nose. How you never cared but lately you’ve started realizing how your teeth are badly misaligned.

All the dumbest stuff you’ve done. All the amazing things you’ve done. All the things you were passionate about. All the times you punched the walls. The art journal you had when you were 17. All the laughs you collected in imaginary jars.

The time you thought you could be perfect. The time you gave up. The time you grabbed yourself by the collar and shook yourself hard. The water that looked like sparkling diamonds. The stars you saw on the road. The times you got butt-hurt over the most trivial things.

The time you realized that there were things you were more scared of than jinns. The time you were the faster runner because you calculated 3x4 and took your slippers off during that race in the night when you were 6.  

The times when all you did was read YA fantasy. How you got disappointed in so many people. How you now want to be a whole new different. And I’ll make it happen. You won’t win this time. I’m taking things into my own hands. You’ll fight, but I want the best for you.

We tried all sorts of things. Fell into utter despair, but now it’s time for a NEW ERA MUAHHAHHAHAAHHAHA.

Anyway, I really cried writing some off the stuff above, but the thing is, I’m here to record that I’m going off my regular path. It’s not bringing me to the level I want to be. I won’t be changing a lot of stuff; I’ll just be adding a few new things to my lifestyle. I’m giving up on a few things, and trying out some old methods I used to implement in my life. The watered down version is that I’m going to be going back to some of my old ways. I never thought that would be possible, but here we are.

Listen, I’m not completely doing a 360 and going back. I can’t do that; it’s impossible, because I’ve come a long way, obviously. I’m just tired of how some aspects of my life are going, and I’m choosing to go back. No one’s probably going to notice, anyway. WHO EVEN READS MY BLOG? It’s not like I want you to. Bugger off.